"Didn't Want To Lose My Coke" from P3 on Vimeo.

Scout-O-Rama

CPR Saturday

Coffee sign in the font from Dogma (Avquest)










"Adult DVD"

Massive Picture Post

Last Week...Last Post.

MONDAY

Talked about the Olypmpics and the awesomeness of the Opening Ceremony.

I got experimental with cocoa puffs, a juice bottle, and a ping pong ball in the kitchen.

Swim check went well since there only about twenty kids who had to take it.


I walked around trying to figure where I was needed.
Not much happened during rowing.

The circuits/fuses kept going out during lunch which created chaos in the kitchen.
Also during this time the fan blade got busted.

Lunchtime Game: Belly Flop
For the first time in five years a camper beat a staff member in the belly flop off.

Once again a large group of kids in E Prep.

After that I sat at free swim where we watched the seal get a little crazy. It hung out at the loading ramp across the way and barked at a woman and her dog for a good ten minutes. I blame the woman who so stupid since she kept pacing the loading dock just asking for the seal to kill her dog.

Two kids signed up for mile swim. One kid had no chance whatsoever. The other was a swimmer and I remember him talking about it during one of our classes. Bryan was able to convince the other kid to delay his first try until tomorrow. While the other kid was confident with his swimming skills and so we took him into the water where he finished it on his first try.


Forgot when in the day this happened but J.P. made a wager with the campers. To the first kid who could lick their elbow he would reward them with a box of otter pops. One kid was able to do it but he was only given six otter pops, since none of us expected that he would be able to do it.


TUESDAY

The circuits/fuses still kept going out. Using the microwaves became a miniature quest in itself.

Went on a fuel run.

Taught some rowing.

Lunchtime game: Sandcastle building contest.

Most of the staff was in the lounge after lunch and we talked for a while about random things.

Helped out with Envi Sci.
And went to the Estuary.

WEDNESDAY

The lobby was closed due to a ten in crack in the glass. Which I guess has been there for several years, though I only noticed it this year because the inspectors made a big fuss over it.
So much of a fuss that we had to get it repaired immediately.
Instead of closing camp or performing the repair on the weekend we had to work our way around the crews that blocked off the main walkway through the building.
Several people had to be stationed to direct the kids and their parents around since some didn't notice the glaring yellow tape and the fact that the front stairs were blocked off.

Theme Day: Olympic. I forgot to dress up but I had a way out. Which didn't present itself until I got there.

Zaq forgot the keys to the 40 so we had to book it to his house during opening rally. Got back just in time to start motorboating and all that.

Went to jellyfish cove.

Don't remember much about rowing.

Talked about the Scorpion King 2
and how if they ever plan to make a Mummy 4 they need to have a mummy from every culture on the planet. Native American Mummy, Eskimo Mummy etc.

Lunchtime Game: Run Paddle Run

Had stretcher races in E Prep.

Used the 50's daddy as a chase boat.

THURSDAY

I got to work and groggily got freaked out when I thought I saw someone standing in the bush underneath the window of the staff lounge. Turned out to be a mouse.

Got a new freezer too. Nice retro one that didn't freeze the air but actually had a cooling system that ran through the shelves themselves.

Motorboating went up the factory channel and messed around. Pushed the 40 to it's limit and jumped it's own wake.

I hopped off and picked up some Districts.

Jumped off the dock onto the boat while carrying them too.

Lunchtime Game: Beach Steal The Bacon w/ PFDs.

E-Prep.

Got pulled over by the coast guard during Envi Sci.
I'll explain in more detail later.



FRIDAY

Quote of the Morning

"Anchovies, leaves of the sea" Jacob.

Staff plank walking.
I belly flopped and couldn't feel my body for a few minutes afterwards.

Helped with orienteering.

Finished Rowing.

GIRL SCOUT WAR
I'll explain in more detail later.

and... I didn't really write much more after that.

Four Days, One Post

TUESDAY

James brought in his laptop where he played some Pokemon. Which kept us entertained as we thought back on times when there were only 150 Pokemon.

Dana, J.P. and I talked about the earthquakes of yesterday (and years) and what could possibly happen when the big on hits.

Boombox was brought onto the beach.

Run Paddle Run on a Tuesday. This is an odd occurrence.

J.P. brought out his...music making station (Can't think of a better name) and played some music from behind the Trading Post counter for the rest of the day.

...

WEDNESDAY

Theme Day: Pirates

Helped with Motorboating.

Rowing was interesting. Sat on the dock for most of the time.

Blasted some music through James' amp.

Lunchtime Game : Limbo Abandon Ship

Possibility of a Cinematography Merit Badge next year. Zaq and I started planning how the class would go.

Started reading Catch 22 when Vincent and Christian aren't reading their copy. '

...

THURSDAY

Brendan walked up the backstairs with Waterskis on.

Putted around Naples with Motorboating.

Dealt with some idiots who lost their boogie board on the beach.

While Zaq and I sat in the staff lounge waiting for the next class to start we got word that the fishing boat's engine had died and we were sent to jumpstart it with the 40.

Once we got past the jetty the swells almost got the best of our boat and we couldn't exactly go out much farther, let alone any faster.

Headed in after driving around for fifteen minutes or so.


Lunchtime Game: Obstacle Course

Part of the course involved rolling kid in a large barrel. We took advantage of the campers trust in us and rolled them up a hill when they were inside.
After the game was over we rolled Ray around.

Helped with motorboating.

During extended care we rolled a kid into the water while he was in the barrel.

...

FRIDAY

David returned from Europe and told us of his travels.

Talked about Bryan's roommate.

Since it was a bunch (7ish) staff members last day we had a huge plank walk before work started.

Got hugged by an LBMI Chicken.

Went to Jamba with Motorboating.

Went to Jamba with Rowing.

Awesome Potluck.

Lunchtime Game: Pirate Ship Game.


Witnessed a mini canoe war as we were heading to Jamba Juice.
A bit of capsizing and chaos on the way for the small boat sailors.
Vince wasn't allowed into Best Buy since he wasn't wearing a shirt but a cracked out hobo was standing less than ten feet away from us.
Zaq ordered an Orgasm at Jamba.

Once we got back we had a blind "Regular or Diet soda" test to prove that there is a noticeable difference between them.

Concoction of Doom (Ultimate Root Beer Float):
Polenta that had been sitting in the sun for a few hours, every soda imaginable, pasta, refried beans, chilli, variety of chips, Asian Salad Dressing, Brownies, cookies, cocoa puffs and much much more. Left to sit for about twenty minutes.

We ended up tossing it out the window where the smell made it's way up to the 2nd floor.


Last week next week. Hope it will be as crazy (in a good way) as this week was.

Week 7 Day I

Typed out another Buccaneer Tribune Today
Cringe worthy pun. "Arrrrrrr You Ready For Pirate Week?"

Oh and we only have 65 campers this week. Woohoo.

Got nostalgic over Star Wars, Legos, the improvement of the toy lightsaber and souvenir pens.

Fuel Run with Zaq. Also crashed by Best Buy.

4 campers in Rowing. This might actually be a good week.

Matt and Kyle had a mini paint war on the beach.

Lunchtime Game: Sandcastle Building Contest.

12 Campers in First Aid.
One made out with the CPR dummy...which was a guy.

During the break Bryan and I tried to microwave a hot pocket to the point of dramatic explosion.
But it failed.

Cleaned out the Christian Closet and found one of the most racist puppets we've ever seen. Bryan and I had a short puppet show which J.P. recorded.

Days III, IV, V

Wenesday

Ancient Cultures Theme Day.
I went as Indiana Jones.

Fuel Run and trip to 7-11.

Rowing was essentially mass chaos. I ended up falling off of the rocks and cutting my leg and foot.

And Small Boat Sailing was fairly uneventful.
But at least we got the boat into the water.


Thursday

Didn't get any sleep during the night so I felt like crap in the morning.
Showed up to work at 1 for Small Boat Sailing.

And...I didn't take any notes, so I guess nothing much happened.

Friday

Made some jello and messed around with the Jesus doll again.

Played a ninjaesque/jenga game with the macaroni and cheese boxes.

Yet another fuel run.

Rowing was uneventful. I sat on the beach and talked about the universe with Bryan.

Jacob and Kyle barbecued some ribs during lunch. I sat and did blue cards while assisting, and by assisting I mean watching and passing around the community pot luck plate.

Took the small boat campers to Jamba Juice and afterwards jumped from the dock to the boat and then from one boat to another.

Week 6 Day I and II

WATER CONTAMINATION: THE SEQUEL

Yes, it happened again. Instead of 300 gallons of sewage it was 12,000 gallons (though some reports are saying it was only 1,200. Suspicious). So, we were not allowed into the water again for at least two days.

After celebrating this news we began to talk about non-work related nonsense such as "What would happen if birds suddenly had superpowers". Zaq tossed up the scenario of a Hulk - Crow.

We also discussed how Hannah Montanna is probably going to be the only 15 year old who became famous for using a catchphrase most commonly used by transvestites and hermaphrodites.

Read last weeks District in the arts and crafts room. Noticed how much a pair of campers (twins) resemble Roman Polanski.



Last week we had Little Hitler minus the moustache.

Experimented with microwave popcorn during lunch.

Lunchtime Game: Team Steal The Bacon

City Inspectors came to do what they do. Inspect. So, throughout the day we were on edge. J.P. and I cleaned the heck out of the galley. Until all hell broke loose. We cleared the counters of all questionable items except for one Trader Joe bag. Upon closer inspection we found out it was a tupperware that was full of flies. J.P immediately threw the bag out the window and we ran through the kitchen killing as many as we could. I picked up the industrial fan and blew most of the flies out the window.



To spritz up the galley we also threw oranges down the garbage disposal.

Couldn't do much in Small Boat Sailing since we couldn't go in the water.
We ended up playing the most intense game of basketball ever.
Since we played with a volleyball we could spike any incoming shot. Plus we had the hoop at it's lowest setting so almost everyone performed acrobatic slam dunks.

...


DAY II

Talked about our record collections and helped out with Personal Fitness.
Spent the last eighth of that time staring at a lava lamp in Kyle's office.

Went on another fuel run and witnessed the LBMI owner(?) going berserk on his volunteer and paid staff.

Played some more basketball in rowing and reminisced about track and field.

Then the earthquake hit.
I thought a kid had run into a window. But then I noticed that both floors had windows shaking. We felt it and had all the kids come out from under the bridge. Some were stupid and essentially dawdled out from under it.

Over the past few years the staff talked about how the campers would react if we suddenly had to evacuate. We predicted that if some crazy hobo came onto the beach and began shooting up anything that moved, the campers would react like this.

"Get off the beach! There's a hobo with a machine gun!"

"What?"
"Why?"

So, today when an earthquake occurred we told the kids to get out from under the bridge we got this response.

"What?"
"Why?"
"That wasn't an earthquake"

We took our group of kids to the "meeting spot" where Bryan gave a well placed impromptu emergency preparedness lesson.

The campers were taken to the bowl where we played the lunchtime game before lunch. I ran around and tried to get a hold of people outside of work. Then we took a trip to my car to charge James' Ipod.

After lunch we found out that the water had been cleared, even though earlier in the day you could run a stick through the water and make a path in the thin layer of sludge that had formed on the surface.

Took the small boat sailing campers to the beach to have them do their swim check.
After that we returned to the base and started to round up parts to get the boats into the water.

We finally found everything and assembled the boats. We finished with thirty minutes to spare and two boats went into the water ( eight out of ten kids got to go in a boat today). Note to self. Get them into the water much earlier tomorrow.

Days III, IV, V

Western Week. I went dressed as a very boring looking cowboy but ended up looking like a lumberjack with a cowboy hat.

In rowing I had to rearrange a few boats since two of the boats had holes in them. And no slow and steady leaks either. More like something you would see out of a cartoon. A pinhole that's squirting a stream a good three inches in the air when you sit in it.

A bit of chaos occurred before during and after the water balloon toss. Instead of investing in water balloons we ended up buying regular balloons. So, these could be filled with a ridiculously large amount of water and would end up the size of a small basketball.

This meant that it takes a lot to get these balloons to pop. Plus they needed to be heaved with great force.

As usual a few of the staff (including me) stole a few of the balloons so we could attack people later. After that we headed back into the staff lounge. I found Victor staring out the window with a balloon in his hand. We tried to figure out who the target was going to be. I ended up throwing it. But instead of hitting it's target it few towards one of the containers. I was nervous with the thought of wasting a water balloon on a large metal box but instead it flew between the canopy and the container and almost hit a kid in the head (pictures of space to be posted later).

The campers who became frustrated with their lack of ammo threw a basketball through the open window. Victor and I waited a few minutes before returning fire. I tossed the basketball out the window where in nailed a kid in the chest which immediately sent him to the ground. It turned out that he was more shocked by a basketball falling from nowhere than injured.

Shortly after that Victor found another smaller water balloon in the freezer.

Helped Bryan with the mile swim and cleaned up after work with a scuba mask on.


DAY IV

Went on a fuel run with Lauren. Picked up a few issues of "The District".

During rowing a few campers buried one of their own up to his head in sand. He used a snorkel to breathe and we have a few pictures somewhere of the final product.

I guess there was a seal in the water. This was never confirmed. Either way, we had to have the campers get out of the water for a few minutes just in case it was rabid.

Had some milk and cookies for lunch.

Lunchtime Game : Run Paddle Run
I got a little arsty with the camp digital camera.

J.P. and I found out the amazing burning qualities of your average blue card.

Bit of a backstory for this next one. I get bored at work. Anyone does. And instead of converting to the usual drug or alcohol abuse, I do little "science experiments" in the kitchen. Most don't get more complicated than your average "Try It!" experiments from Bill Nye.

I went through a phase of freezing things. So, I put a few metal utensils in a coffee cup and arranged them in a "modern art" sort of way. I left them in the freezer for a while and removed i later. I tried to remove it by way of the hot water heater we use for the cup o' noodles. I didn't expect the ice to come out so quickly so the coffee mug hit the floor and shattered. Once the evidence was removed I began to parade around camp with the cup o' utensils.

After showing it around for a bit someone asked if it was solid ice. I replied, "Yes" while flicking the bottom of the block, which cracked a hole in it and water began to drain onto my feet. So, I ended up carrying a semi-hollow ice sculpture around for a few minutes before I became bored with and destroyed it on the beach.

MILE SWIM

Bryan and I only had to deal with one camper this week. But James and Tim came along too for company and whatnot.

During the trek we did the following:

• Bryan talked in a Norwegian accent while I performed Eddie Izzard stand up routines while doing a very poor impression.
  
• Saw one of the most ridiculous looking party boats ever "Star Party Cruises".
• Almost got run over by a guy who was on his bluetooth while driving a boat.
  

Messed around with Mike's rear view glasses when out of nowhere a random canoe came onshore. By the way, it was full of chicks and to make it even more odd, they all knew Robbie.



DAY V

Read the newspaper. Bryan noticed that every animated movie except for Wall - E had the "Family Approved" seal on it.

Helped out with motorboating. Picked up a huge stack of OC Weeklies, LA Weeklies and Districts.

Went to the bowl and had random conversations based on the articles with Bryan, James and Steve while the campers played some soccer.

Had the most anemic potluck ever. With not one but two types of crock pot chilli (provided by Vince and I) A bunch of dip with a few bags o' chips and some soda. There were other items, but I can't remember any of them at the moment.

Lunchtime Game: Obstacle Course.
I was in charge of the zipline which used the rubbercoated dive brick that we use for swimming and lifesaving. As the campers would finish I would ask them to hand me the rope, at that moment I would let go of another rope which would cause the 8lbs of bricky death to plummet towards them. Got some amazing reactions.

Since Friday was Mike's last day we had to get him in the water one way or another. To make a long story short we did. It just took 7 of us to get him in.

Week V, Day I and II

Day I

Talked about how only in America would we name a roller coaster after the screaming shits.

Talked about Batman. The awesomeness of the series, the potential villain(s) in the next movie and much much more.

For some reason there's a copy of Teen Vogue in the staff lounge. We used it to mock the random looking models.

Helped Bryan with Personal Fitness. And by helped I mean, sat in chair off to side while I was feeling sick. Oh, and I collected blue cards (a few of them at least).

Rowing was alright. Have an uneven group of campers which means that I have to share a boat with one of them. Wonderful.

Lunchtime Game : Belly Flop.
I love how most of the campers never understand the concept or technique that goes along with a belly flop.

Started a small fire in the kitchen. Using some paper and a cooking pot. Used the fan to get most of the smoke out.

Cleaned front stairs so I didn't leave until most of the staff left. Oof.


Day II

On the cabinet today was a sign from AA (which meets at our building on weekends) that read "Please stay out of our cupboard we need our supplies". We left a sign for them that read "Keep your supplies in your cupboard - Thank You". Last week they left all their random teas and strong coffee out on the counter. Possibility of a passive-aggressive note war with the AA.

Had small staff "party" in the staff lounge before work. Talked about various classic rock artists.





Tagged along with motor boating. Was once again in awe of some of these houses.

Rowing was ridiculous. Got in eleven minutes late for lunch.

Lunchtime Game: Sandcastle Building
James' patrol won with "Snake In A Boot" sculpture. Which went along with the western week theme very well.

Emergency Prepardness. Almost fell asleep while teaching it. Thank God that Matt crashed by and taught the second half.

Almost tagged along with motor boating but was stopped since there were too many people in the boat.

Sat in free swim with James and propped ourselves under his makeshift lean to.



Cleaned the inside of the freezer today. Or at least chipped off the layer of ice that has formed over the past few years. So, when I went to unplug it (I hadn't noticed that my hand had ice all over it) I got electrocuted.
Up one arm and into the other. It was odd.


Tomorrow is Western Week Theme Day! I'm thinking about dressing as an Indian Casino card dealer.

Week IV, Day V

Woke up at 7:50 inside of one of the boats. Kyle, Zaq, James and I slept in one of the boats after seeing "The Dark Knight" at midnight. After waking up we tromped into the base. I changed into the work uniform and headed back downstairs to discuss Batman with everyone.

Once again tagged along with motorboating, went to Barnes and Noble to pick up some OC Weeklies and to check if my letter had been published in Entertainment Weekly. I couldn't find any Entertainment Weeklies in the entire store.

I worked on blue cards during rowing...and small boat sailing.

Lunch time game: Pudding eating contest.
Ray was attacked by pudding at the end of the competition.

Belly Flop off between Vincent and Jacob.

I'm essentially dead tired right now. Good night and good luck.

Week IV, Day IV

Discussed the awesomeness of Meth Minute 39.

Motorboated around the marina for the first time since I was a camper.

Barely made it under one of the bridges. Waved at random junior lifeguard kids, and crewers.

Discussed some of the ginourmous houses.

Week IV, Day III

Theme Day: Movie Week.

I dressed as Raoul Duke,



Zaq was a Ghostbuster
Bryan was the expendable red shirt guy from Star Trek
James was Forrest Gump (though many of the campers thought he was from "Balls Of Fury" since he was carrying a ping pong paddle around.)



Spent the morning typing the rowing syllabus. I found out too late that it was only supposed to be about a page long. I had already started on my fourth.

Played some basketball during rowing since we still couldn't go into the water.

Dropped campers at bowl and headed to staff lounge where we dissected different types of stews.

Messed around with a colorguard rifle. Stuck out of the window and scared some campers.

Lunchtime Game: Water balloon toss. As usual, chaos ensued after everyone had finished throwing their water balloons.

And amazingly the water was deemed swimmable so we were allowed to take the campers on a swim check.

Emergency prep we had a stretcher relay races.

Helped Bryan with mile swim. The only camper who signed up finished the swim on his first try. Which is pretty awesome since:

1. It's a fairly far distance to swim
2. It had a fairly high concentration of sewage in the water.

Finished work and drove off to volunteer at the church.

Week IV, Day II

Sign in table banter:

The condition of the water around the base.
For the water to be deemed swimmable it has to have been at least two days of clean water. Which means, best case scenario, the earliest we could swim would be noon tomorrow.

Star Wars
French C-3PO
and Asian R2-D2 (Bryan somehow found a way to make R2-D2 sound Asian)

In the staff lounge, messed around with "Not-So Strike Anywhere Matches".

Sat in during motor boating. Cruised around the bay. Went to Jellyfish Cove for the first time. Saw some ducks in a line putting around the docks.

Lunchtime Game: Obstacle Course with "Raiders Of The Lost Ark" Movie Theme Twist.
Kids somersaulted in an attempt to beat the runner. Only problem was some kids who volunteered couldn't somersault right or for anywhere near as long as they were expected too. One kid got lightheaded after all the rolling.

Emergency Prep was a huge group once again.
Finally got some help. In the form of Bryan.

After that tried to sneak aboard motor boating. But the boats weren't starting so I ended up hanging out with free swim at the bowl.

Played a bit of frisbee and got it stuck in a palm tree. James risked life and finger s to get it down.

Ended the day listening to Prince.

Week IV Day I

Arrived at work where talked about the concerts that we went to over the weekend or plan to go to over the next week.

Once again analyzed Batman.

Had a conversation with a crazy French hating scout dad.

Talked about trips we plan to go on (most to Europe).

Wave of crazy and snarky parents arrived.

Went to Mother's Beach for the swim check and discovered that it was closed due to a sewage leak from the beach's restrooms.
Long story short, couldn't go in water today. Not sure how tomorrow is going to be.

Once inside the base we saw the scariest staff picture ever.

Also in the lounge was "My First Drug Set" (actually it was a science kit but it could've fooled anyone).

Messed around with Tim's little contraption for part of the first half of the day.

Didn't do much in rowing.

Almost fell asleep while teaching Emergency Preparedness.


Free swim kids went over to the bowl and we had them play "Smear The Queer" with a stress ball. Very glad that parents weren't nearby.

Handed out slips of paper to parents about the whole "We Can't Swim In The Water Without Risk Of Genetic Mutation" thing.
Wrote about 108 E's since Ray typed "sewage" as "swage".

I'm tired. A lot more happened. But I can't remember any of it.

Found old notes from last year.
Made picture based on it.
This was back when Bryan, David and I taught First Aid and Emergency Preparedness